The Plantar Wart, part 3

I got home safe and sound and spent the next several weeks with an unthinkably large hole in the bottom of my heel. Recovering from a "foot surgery" like that wasn't as difficult as you might expect. I did have pain the first few days, but I remember tying on my tennis shoes and going to attempt to play ultimate with some friends not more than one week later. I was thinking I might not actually be able to run on it, but I could. I could run on my left foot even with the crater of an open wound in the heel.

I returned to see Dr. Morley at the appointed time and asked him if he thought the thing would come back. He said, no, he didn't think so. Yes!

I don't remember how long it took, but pretty soon the hole healed and my heel was as smooth and blemish free as it had ever been.

Oh, the joy and the freedom.

But it wouldn't last. We moved to California and within a couple of years, the evil parasite had moved back into my foot. But this time, I knew exactly how to handle it. Just call up a podiatrist and have him surgically remove the beast. So, (sometime in 2005, I believe) I got on the horn with good ol' Kaiser Permanente and asked to make an appointment with a podiatrist. Oh no, we can't do that. You have to have a referral from your primary care physician to see a podiatrist. What's the problem, anyway?

"Well, you see, I have a plantar wart that I need to have removed."

"Oh, well, if you have a plantar wart, you wouldn't see a podiatrist. You'd see a dermatologist (dummy) and you don't need a referral to make an appointment with one of those."

"A dermatologist? Is the dermatologist going to be willing to cut this thing out of my foot?"

"I wouldn't be able to speak to that, ma'am, but if you'd like, I could set you up with an appointment and you could ask the doctor that yourself."

Fine. It's worth a try, right? And apparently my only option.

Here's what the dermatologist said:

1. No, she would not be willing to cut the thing out.
2. She would be willing to freeze it with liquid nitrogen.
3. Come back once a month for a freezing treatment until it's gone.

Here's what I thought:

1. Drat! I knew a dermatologist wouldn't help me.
2. There's no way the freezing thing is going to work.
3. Every time I come visit this dermatologist (for a freezing treatment that is not going to work), I have to pay a $50 co-pay. Um, no.

Now what?

...to be continued...