Give. Take.

My three-year-old's favorite things to say lately are: "go away, Mama" and "wait, Mama, I need to hold your hand." And yes, sometimes he says them in the same breath.

At first, when he started to tell me to go away, my husband and I got all serious and said, "it's not nice to tell mama to go away. Say nice things." And then, further, "you can't talk like that to mama. It's not ok." And so forth.

He didn't stop saying it. And boy did we start getting mad when he continued. That didn't help.

Now, when he tells me to go away, I often say "where do you want me to go?"

"Should I go to Zimbabwe? Australia? Canada?" Or, Michigan, Pennsylvania, California, however the mood strikes me.

He says no. He has no idea, of course, where these places are, but he has some concept, I think, that they are far away. Then he says, "you should stay, mama. you should stay."

And the game is over, usually. Is it a game? I suppose it's my way of giving his words power without giving them power. And no, he hasn't stopped saying it.

Of course, sometimes, I do just go away. This morning, waking up was difficult for the three-year-old, and he cried and cried for his Daddy. I was told to go away so many times, that finally I just went. I'm not sure that was the right thing to do, but I was at a loss and my little game wasn't helping. Daddy did come eventually, but he was in a rush to get out the door to work, so he left right away. After more crying, more "go away, I don't like you," and more "I want Daddy," my son finally got himself dressed and was ready to head upstairs to drink his morning cup of milk. I started to go upstairs, thinking he would follow me. Then he was crying again, saying "don't go upstairs without me mama!" and then, calmer, "we should go together."